We have talked a lot about the not so fun, draining, sit down and cry, nitty gritty parts of autism. There are a lot of things that many don't give a second thought to but I have to give myself a pep talk for. I have adjusted to that for the most part and it's just part of the daily routine. I can usually have that conversation with myself and go about my day with no tears involved. I can even occasionally laugh my way through the public escapade we occasionally put on.
But there is another part of autism too. The part that almost made me mad when suggested just after diagnosis. The amazing, awesome, exciting and incredible parts of autism. It might be cliche, but Alden has taught me so much. Fun fact for those of you who don't know, Brandon and I both went to college in the education field. Fairly early on in both of our separate programs we were advised it may be smart to go into special education as there was a growing need and it would make it much easier to get a job in the future. Both of us, separately at this phase of our lives, decided that while this was an admirable profession, we just didn't have the patience that was needed for that kind of thing. I imagine on that day God had a good chuckle and I have to appreciate his sense of humor.
Little did we know, we would soon learn SO much about patience and strength....the kind we never knew we were capable of.
Not only has Alden taught us so much, he has helped make Jude into the amazing loving, kind and compassionate young man he is. There is no classic sibling rivalry. I never have to hear "Mooooooom Alden isn't sharing" or "Alden is touching my stuff". My nieces and nephews are about the same age and are constantly fighting. It is a right of passage when growing up with siblings. But something I as a parent, can't say I'm disappointed to skip ;-)
We have learned to appreciate every little step. The steps we unfortunately under appreciated with Jude. The first wave, point, bubble blown, or coloring page. We get to see the beauty of the purest joy known during Earthly existence and for Alden it usually comes from swinging outside or popping bubbles. I wish I could be so easily enthralled! He is so good and innocent. There is no greed or jealousy. That is how he finds such joy in the 'simple' things.
Alden will never be to old or to cool to snuggle with me. I will admit I was slightly and very briefly disappointed when the doctor announced "It's a boy" in the middle of my c-section. We had known this would be our last child and decided to not find out the gender during our ultrasound. I had a feeling during my pregnancy that I was carrying a girl but for fear it was wishful thinking, I rarely shared that thought. My biggest fear in being a boy mom was that I wouldn't have the relationship with my children that I have with my mother. Even as an adult we hug and kiss and cuddle just like we did when I was 5yrs old. Don't believe me.....
I knew my sons wouldn't do this into their teen/adult years. Honestly I wouldn't want them to, nobody likes a clingy momma's boy ;-) but Alden doesn't know or care that it isn't socially acceptable to sit on your moms lap and squeeze her in a giant bear hug....and I am SO thankful Alden will always be my snuggle baby, even when he's not so little.
These are a few of the many blessings I count on the days when I'm feeling overwhelmed and start to question why God ever found us deserving of such an extraordinary gift. We truly feel blessed to have been entrusted with such a unique life. That doesn't change the fact that we are realists and have incredibly weak moments while working our way through this crazy beautiful journey.
But there is another part of autism too. The part that almost made me mad when suggested just after diagnosis. The amazing, awesome, exciting and incredible parts of autism. It might be cliche, but Alden has taught me so much. Fun fact for those of you who don't know, Brandon and I both went to college in the education field. Fairly early on in both of our separate programs we were advised it may be smart to go into special education as there was a growing need and it would make it much easier to get a job in the future. Both of us, separately at this phase of our lives, decided that while this was an admirable profession, we just didn't have the patience that was needed for that kind of thing. I imagine on that day God had a good chuckle and I have to appreciate his sense of humor.
Little did we know, we would soon learn SO much about patience and strength....the kind we never knew we were capable of.
Not only has Alden taught us so much, he has helped make Jude into the amazing loving, kind and compassionate young man he is. There is no classic sibling rivalry. I never have to hear "Mooooooom Alden isn't sharing" or "Alden is touching my stuff". My nieces and nephews are about the same age and are constantly fighting. It is a right of passage when growing up with siblings. But something I as a parent, can't say I'm disappointed to skip ;-)
We have learned to appreciate every little step. The steps we unfortunately under appreciated with Jude. The first wave, point, bubble blown, or coloring page. We get to see the beauty of the purest joy known during Earthly existence and for Alden it usually comes from swinging outside or popping bubbles. I wish I could be so easily enthralled! He is so good and innocent. There is no greed or jealousy. That is how he finds such joy in the 'simple' things.
Alden will never be to old or to cool to snuggle with me. I will admit I was slightly and very briefly disappointed when the doctor announced "It's a boy" in the middle of my c-section. We had known this would be our last child and decided to not find out the gender during our ultrasound. I had a feeling during my pregnancy that I was carrying a girl but for fear it was wishful thinking, I rarely shared that thought. My biggest fear in being a boy mom was that I wouldn't have the relationship with my children that I have with my mother. Even as an adult we hug and kiss and cuddle just like we did when I was 5yrs old. Don't believe me.....
These are a few of the many blessings I count on the days when I'm feeling overwhelmed and start to question why God ever found us deserving of such an extraordinary gift. We truly feel blessed to have been entrusted with such a unique life. That doesn't change the fact that we are realists and have incredibly weak moments while working our way through this crazy beautiful journey.
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